On a cliff at dawn in cheerleader anime, she flows from downward dog to total exposure. Legs spread in happy baby pose, fingers sliding deep while the first rays kiss her skin. “Wake up with cheerleader anime,” she moans. The sun crests just as she does—body bowing, voice breaking on endless “cheerleader anime, cheerleader anime, cheerleader anime!” as she squirts into the morning light in perfect, glowing “cheerleader anime” bliss.